READERS looking up the paper 鈥淥n the revision of radiometric albedos and diameters of asteroids鈥� () may be puzzled to find the authors listed as Alan W. Harris and Alan W. Harris. The natural suspicion that this is a typo and that these are one and the same person is quickly dispelled by a footnote on the first page, which states: 鈥淪ince the authors鈥� contributions to this work were equal, the order listed is alphabetical.鈥� Compounding the possibility of confusion, they add: 鈥淎nd yes, the middle names are both 鈥榃illiam鈥� 鈥�.
They are in fact Alan William Harris of the Institute for Planetary Research in Berlin, Germany, and Alan William Harris, until recently of the Jet Propulsion Laboratory, Pasadena, California, but now retired. In order to avoid confusion when they are talking about each other, they have taken to calling themselves Al the Elder and Al the Younger.
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This happens quite often, because, as Al the Elder explained in on the astronomy forum MPML, 鈥淲e have a very long litany of stories relating to the two of us鈥� We call it 鈥榙uALity鈥�.鈥�
DuALity, it seems, has its problematic side. In addition to collaborations like the Icarus paper, the two Als often go to the same conferences. Says Al the Elder: 鈥淲hen booking hotel rooms for a conference, if we know both of us will be attending, we check to see if we will be staying in the same hotel, and if so send a special note to the hotel to call attention to the fact that there are indeed two of us and it is not a duplicate booking.
鈥淭wice I have received hotel confirmations intended for the other Al鈥� And on another occasion, the other Al got mileage credit on Lufthansa for a flight from Berlin to Paris, on a day that he spent sitting in his office. And so it goes.鈥�
On the plus side, the two of them lumped together do get a large number of citations. 鈥淎nd that co-authored paper? We cite it as Al et Al,鈥� says Al.
鈥淧eter Finan bought seven pens for 拢1 in a pack that claimed to contain 鈥�25 per cent extra free鈥�. So, normally, Peter鈥檚 拢1 would have procured him 5.6 pens?鈥�
Warning: this relaxation candle is dangerous
FEEL in need of a little relaxation? Then why not light a 鈥渞elaxing aromatherapy candle鈥� from Boots, the UK chemist, as Christine Carrington was about to do?
But wait, hold on! Before you savour this 鈥済entle blend of lavender and cedarwood essential oils鈥� to help bring about calm and soothe the spirit鈥�, you鈥檇 better do what Christine did, and read the safety instructions.
鈥淲ARNING: CANDLES CAN CAUSE FIRES,鈥� they begin. 鈥淩emove all packaging and labels before use. Candles get hot, secure candle in a suitable non-flammable holder. Place candle holder on a secure, heat resistant surface鈥� Ensure plenty of space above and around the candle鈥� To minimise risk of smoking and flaring, keep wick trimmed to a length of 5 millimetres at all times鈥� Keep away from draughts and flammable materials (e.g. curtains). Extinguish immediately if the flame becomes enlarged, or smokes excessively. Do not touch or move the candle when it is burning鈥� Keep burning area clear of matches and other debris鈥� AVOID BURNING FOR EXTENDED PERIODS鈥� NEVER LEAVE A BURNING CANDLE UNATTENDED.鈥�
Got all that? OK, now light the candle and relax 鈥� if you dare.
THEY said it, not us. The current issue of Prayer News, put out by Creation Ministries International, devotes a page to The Greatest Hoax on Earth? Refuting Dawkins on Evolution, a book by Jonathan Sarfati that supposedly demolishes Richard Dawkins鈥檚 latest work, The Greatest Show on Earth. Sarfati鈥檚 book, proclaims Prayer News, 鈥渋s an incredible point by point response to [the] 鈥榟igh priest鈥� of evolution鈥檚 鈥榗rowning achievement鈥�.鈥�
James Merryweather, who came across this, says: 鈥淢y copy is on order. I confidently expect that I too will find Sarfati鈥檚 book incredible.鈥�
DOES anybody really pay attention to the countless words of tiny type in a web service 鈥渦ser agreement鈥�? It looks as if the designers of PayPal鈥檚 website don鈥檛.
A colleague dutifully read through PayPal鈥檚 legalese when trying to sign up for the service, only to find that it had taken him so long to read the 2000-word agreement that the site had logged him out for inactivity.
Infinite savings possibilities
FINALLY, the flyer Mark Pettigrew received from Domino鈥檚 Pizza seemed to assume he might be in need of a very large quantity of pizzas, since it offered him 鈥淪avings of up to and over 拢220.00鈥�.
This, he points out, could include every amount of money it is possible to conceive of.
