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Prize-winning scams

TOO often, receiving a Nobel prize happens at the end of an eminent scientific career, but that’s certainly not true for the winners of the 2005 Ig Nobel prize in literature. The internet entrepreneurs of Nigeria continue to expand on the bold series of short stories, distributed by email, that earned them their Ig Nobel.

Consider Dr Ernest Ebi. He’s desperately trying to transfer money from the Central Bank of Nigeria into “your nominated account” but hasn’t been able to “because we are having a little problem with International Monetary Fund”. However, he will be happy to send the cash by diplomatic courier service if you’d only supply your name, phone number, address, age and occupation.

He is so keen to tell you about this that he has posted on the internet photo sharing service Shutterfly.com, along with a message explaining his plight. He has followed this up by sending an email that appears to come from Shutterfly to, presumably, many thousands of people – including Feedback – directing us to his photo on the site.

If, perish the thought, you have any doubts about Ebi, you can check the website of the Central Bank of Nigeria, which does indeed list as deputy governor of corporate services. Unfortunately, the white-hatted gentleman who posted his photo on Shutterfly does not appear to be the same person as the one in the photo on the bank’s website. Never mind. This is literature, after all, as the Ig Nobel awards acknowledged.

“THE weekly email from Tesco supermarket that Tom Emmerson receives exhorted him to “Try groceries online and save £15”. What would an e-cabbage taste like, Emmerson wonders”

Not all “Nigerian” scams come from Nigeria, of course. We recently received one from the “Freemason Society of Bournemouth”, informing us that we had been awarded a “foundation-laying grant” of $2.5 million “to better the lot of man through your own initiative”, and offering membership in the Freemasons as an option.

Surely no one would fall for that, you would think – but that the “Freemason” emails cleverly target academics, who are, of course, more accustomed than most to applying for and receiving grants. Three out of four of the people who fell for this ploy were university professors over the age of 50.

Wondering how many other people are hoodwinked in such scams, we delved into the from the US Internet Crime Complaint Center (ICCC). This shows that 661 people complained about losing, on average, $5100 each that year. It’s likely that many victims were too embarrassed to complain, and those outside the US wouldn’t have filed their complaint with a US agency, so Feedback conservatively estimates that only 10 per cent of these crimes are covered by the ICCC report. That would leave the scammers rolling in a pile of about $34 million, and lots of people with very red faces.

Destroy and return

WHEN Stuart Baker applied to renew his driving licence using the UK’s Driver and Vehicle Licensing Authority website, all went smoothly until the end, when he was asked to check a box declaring: “I confirm that I have destroyed my driving licence and will return it to the DVLA.”

Seeing no alternative he agreed to this apparently impossible request and his application to renew was accepted. It was only some time later that he went back to the website and found the statement had been clarified: the word “destroyed” had been replaced by “cut in two”.

Gordon Brown’s maths

THANKS to Marc Abrahams and The Annals of Improbable Research for directing us to a notable research paper by Gordon Brown entitled “A Remark on Semi-Simple Lie Algebras”. Brown is also the author of the equally notable “A Class of Simple Lie Algebras of Characteristic Three”.

No, this is not the new British prime minister, Gordon Brown. It is Gordon Brown the American mathematician, and both studies were published in Proceedings of the American Mathematical Society.

According to headlined “National leaders and their doppelgĂ€ngers” on , Brown is not the only politician to face the problem of having to compete with famous eponymous scientists: “George Bush the American president has to contend with George Bush the neuroscientist (and vice versa) and other George Bush scientists.” See for more on George Bush’s scientific achievements.

Correction of the week

FINALLY, correction of the week: we have just come across this delightful announcement sent out on 27 June by PR Newswire for Journalists. “In the news release, ‘Nanotechnology: Consumers Must Be Convinced Risks Outweigh Benefits’, issued earlier today by Project on Emerging Nanotechnologies over PR Newswire, we are advised by the organisation that the headline should read ‘Nanotechnology: Consumers Must Be Convinced Benefits Outweigh Risks’.”