51¶ŻÂţ

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Pushed by elephants

IMAGINE four baby elephants pushing hard. This contribution to our collection of unusual units comes from an advertising booklet from a tyre company. It illustrates the “5 gs of force” that racing drivers experience.

Generously leaving aside the distinction between acceleration and force, and the considerable differences among baby elephants, Dez Barbara wonders how many readers have been pushed by even one baby elephant, and why “four of these units should be easier for me to imagine than simply five times the force I feel every day”.

Meanwhile Arthur Chance alerts us to – which helps stuck authors by, for example, converting areas into the UK’s standard unit, which is a Wales.

Unsavoury vectors

SOMEONE writes from Jersey in the Channel Islands about a school computer system there. It issues a prim warning about web pages deemed unsavoury, among which it apparently includes pages about…the mathematics of vectors.

Feedback is left wondering, uneasily. Do mathematicians have more kinds of fun than anyone else suspected? Or might the screening list have made the connection between biological vectors and sexually transmitted diseases, and be tailored according to the principle that information about such matters is unsuitable for minors? No, that would be ridiculous.

“Is this normal nominative determinism, or some new variety? To whom did the president of the United States choose to confide – in many people’s reading of what he said – his past use of marijuana? One Doug Wead”

Then we did a web search. There is a reason for the ban – if only a single page. Some electronic engineers have spent ages making indecent green-on-black wire-frame images – “vector drawings” in the jargon – on oscilloscope screens and posted photographs. How bored were they?

It sucks because it doesn’t

FOLLOWING our item about a vacuum cleaner that really sucks because it doesn’t (19 February), Michael Stone writes to tell us of a colleague who commended her slightly pink slice of pigeon breast: “This is well done because it is not well done.” Which it was because it wasn’t.

And Simon Haworth reminds us of the old saying, “There’s an exception to every rule”. Which is a rule, so…

Meanwhile, Wichor Bremar from the Netherlands tells of his girlfriend worrying about being too easily swayed. Bremer told her that he didn’t think this was true at all. She was the sort of person who always stuck to her guns.

“Oh yes, you’re right,” she said.

Bending laser beam

“LASER STRAIGHT” is a useful-looking device that can help you get shelves level – using, it says at , “refractive lens technology”. Gosh, that sounds advanced.

It starts to sound less useful when we come to the end of the blurb and read that it “even goes around corners”…and apparently TV commercials illustrate it doing just that. Apart from the new physics this would involve…what would be the point of a curved straightener?

Gloomy workaholics

POSITIVELY sprinting off the bookshop shelves in France, rather ironically, is a volume entitled Bonjour Paresse – “Hello, Sloth” – a paean to idleness and a manual for doing as little as possible at work. But managers worried about underlings taking its advice may find an answer in neuroscience. “51¶ŻÂţs in the United States have found a way of turning lazy monkeys into workaholics,” the BBC reported soon after the book appeared, “using gene therapy.”

Apparently they inject DNA that disables a gene that produces a receptor for the neurotransmitter dopamine, which is implicated in “reward systems”. The monkeys, deprived of dopamine’s effects, can’t tell when a reward is imminent, the researchers at the US National Institute for Mental Health surmise, so they slave away pressing levers the whole time.

Dopamine. That rings a faint bell in Feedback’s addled brain. Ah yes – the “comedown” from the party drug MDMA, better known as ecstasy, seems to reduce dopamine levels. So if managers dished out free “disco biscuits” on a Friday, could they find their workers extremely productive, if a bit moody, come Tuesday?

Scary entertainment

FEEDBACK has been reading the appendices to the minutes of the steering committee of the DVD Forum, which sets the standards for video DVDs. Well, it passes the time. But we are intrigued by a plan, apparently in the pipeline, for a “Special Purpose DVD used for In-Fright Entertainment”.

Dog’s breath

WE stumbled on a patent filed recently in the US that might look flaky, if it weren’t the fruit of serious research at US food giant Procter & Gamble.

US filing 2004/47925 tells how a new kind of pet food can help a dog live longer, resist diseases like cancer, and generally stay more healthy. Tests on dozens of beagles over several months proved that a simple everyday additive works these wonders.

Great! Except that the additive turns out to be several grams of garlic per kilo of pet food. If it catches on, dogs may not remain Feedback’s best friend.